At long last, I’ve been discovered by Hollywood.  But don’t worry, I’ll still remember the “little people” that helped me get to where I am today. 

How did I launch my movie career, you ask?  Quite simply:  They came to me.

I live in the Castro in San Francisco, a neighborhood that’s been transformed over the past few weeks for the filming of the movie Milk, which deals with the life and assassination of Harvey Milk, one of the country’s first openly gay politicians to hold elective office.  In their efforts at authenticity, the movie’s producers have transformed Castro Street to look at it did during the 1970’s, a move that has met with decidedly mixed reactions from business owners.   Personally, I find it fascinating, because every day I get to experience an important chapter in the city’s history by simply walking down the street — garish 70’s costumes abound, as do police cars from the same era, storefronts dating from that time, and those hilarious mutton-chop sideburns.  I’ve also encountered some disturbingly realistic scenes:  Last week, I was horrified to see a group of “police officers” violently clubbing an obviously gay man.  This of course was a recreation, but the realism caught me off guard.  It does, however, speak to the potential importance of the film as a historical document.

Back to my being “discovered.”  I was rushing down Castro Street yesterday, late to an appointment, and engaged in my own version of multi-tasking, which involved simultaneously returning phone calls and eating lunch from one of SF’s many fine restaurants.   Specifically, I was talking to my friend Brian while scarfing down a turkey-avocado sandwich:

You’ll never guess who I saw today! he exclaimed.

I give up, I replied, mayonnaise dripping down my chin.  I was vaguely aware of some shouting going on, but was fixated on finding a napkin.

Sean Penn!! he cried.  He’s playing Harvey Milk in that movie they’re filming, and I saw him right on Castro Street!

You don’t say, I murmured, now worried about a splotch of avocado on my new shirt.   As a former New Yorker, I’m unimpressed by celebrity sightings.  The ambient shouting seemed more intense, but what concern was that of mine?

He’s grown a beard and everything for the part! Brian effused.  I can’t believe how much he looks like Harvey Milk!  I was going to ask for his autograph, but all these producer-type people shooed me away!

Suddenly, I realized that all the shouting was directed at ME.  What’s more, I noticed several cameras pointing in my direction, recording my every move.  Immediately I was concerned about having a clump of sprouts stuck in my teeth. 

As I adjusted my hair, I turned and saw none other than Sean Penn, less than three feet away and looking at me expectantly.  Nice of you to join us, he said amicably.  Or was it sarcasm I heard in his voice? 

There was no time to worry about such trifling details . . . this was my big chance!  I’ve heard rumors that Penn is getting upwards of $10 million for his role in Milk.  I could do the job for half that amount, I reasoned. I rushed over to the producers, who were still clamoring for my attention.  They started yelling something about disruption of their filming, but I assume that was due to the paparazzi I’d no doubt attracted.  I quickly laid out the terms of my contract, and let them know I was available for filming immediately.  I didn’t get a response right away, but I’m assuming their people will be in touch with  my people.  That’s how it’s done with big stars like me. 

I’m not sure how much longer I’ll be able to keep up these posts, because I’m sure the demands of stardom will be consuming a great deal of my time.  See you at the Oscars!

Posted on February 2nd, 2008 by Thomas
Filed under: San Francisco