So the U.S. House of Reps rejected the $700 billion bailout package and the DOW crashed 777 points. Wall Street is crushed that it won’t be getting a free lunch after having gambled (and lost) other peoples’ money on leveraged derivatives and junk mortgage securities. Asian markets are tanking and the Europeans have their cockamamie heads buried in the sand, hoping nobody sees them.

Everybody’s quaking with fear at the trillions of credit default swaps floating ethereally in the ether around Wall Street. There’s no job security, there’s no credit left in the market, and a whole lot of Wall Street execs are about to join the ranks of subprime borrowers.

Its pretty apparent that Wall Street is going to be hung out to dry by the nation, cause people have no sympathy for the fatcats who blew away their retirement savings accounts. Let’s not talk about any second vacation homes or luxury golf resorts in the Adirondacks now. That’s a very good way to get tarred and feathered and ridden out on a rail.

Under these circumstances, what’s a poor Wall Street banker to do, except head for the hills? I have some splendid ideas for hiding out in the Adirondacks, therby combining life on the lam with cheap Upstate New York vacations. Best place to hide from a sundry crowd of would-be lynchers, Congressional subpoenas and bankruptcy proceedings would be Lake Placid. Here’s a good selection of choices for the soon-to-be destitute banker.

Golden Arrow Lakeside Resort - 167 rooms, 5 floors and located perfectly for outdoorsy vacations on Mirror Lake. Especially beautiful setting in the winter. Info: 2559 Main St. Lake Placid NY 12946; www.golden-arrow.com/; Broke-ass banker friendly rates from $122 onwards.

Town and Country Motor Inn - Neat motel, very discrete and all. Good place to hide out,  located in the Olympic Village. You could also bring the wife down for the weekend, considering there’s a cool swimming pool with a deck lounging area and a family barbeque spot. Oh, and there’s a free Xpress shuttle service, providing free village & Whiteface Mountain transportation, which stops right at the motel. And free wireless internet for keeping track of the mayhem back home. Perfect for penny-wise and dollar foolish Wall Street types. Info: 2200 (67) Saranac Ave. Lake Placid NY 12946; www.tcmotorinn.com/; Bargain basement prices from $69 onwards. 

Other cheap lodging options for deadbeat financial types include the Northwoods Inn of Lake Placid, Spruce Lodge Bed & Breakfast, Swiss Acres Inn, and the Econo Lodge Lake Placid. 

Winter is just around the corner, and all these are excellent places for winter sports. Not to mention the health benefits of an invigorating morning walk in the crystal clear air with wisps of smoke puffing out of the log cabins. Evenings can be spent by the fireside with fellow wanted white collar criminals swilling brandy and puffing cigars with tales about the good ol’ days when the FED could bail out Bear Stearns without pesky Congresscritters getting in the way. Lie low and cool down in the mountains until the heat goes away and the credit crunch eases up. Then you can go back to NYC and start rolling the dice again.

Posted on September 30th, 2008 by Thomas
Filed under: New York, Vacation