Yesterday we wrote about travel tools to help singles hitch up with like-minded strangers while on the road. Turns out, there’s such a thing as Sustainable Sex (these treehuggers are way outta control…), and we weren’t doing the earth a favor by advocating long distance relationships with people in cities far way from your residence.

Slate has a really neat article on how long-distance relationships are responsible for a lot of global warming and CO2 emissions. That gives us around 6.7 million unmarried Americans in long-distance relationships. Add in the 3.4 million married people who told the Census that they live separately but aren’t “separated,” and our total rises to more than 10 million individuals—or 5 million LDRs [long distance relationships]. If all of these people made like our two-career couple and drove the distance from D.C. to New York City every two weeks, they would produce a total of about 18 million metric tons of CO2 a year.

So, date local, and you can totally forget about one-night stands or romantic flings during your New York vacations. On the other hand, this could have serious repercussions on questions of genetic pools.

I mean, its a well known fact that migration, emigration and mixing up as many gene pools as possible is necessary to ensure a heathy gene in the coming generations. That’s basically why people don’t marry in-family - Corrupts the gene. So if you restrict yourself to within your city, or even your state, that’s a recipe for triggering the end of the human race. So, if you travel far and wide, and find yourself a partner fro a sexual romp in one of those cheap Phoenix hotels, you’re doing the human race a lot of good by spreading around your genetic code.

Catch-22 situation really - End of the human race due to genetic corruption, or end of the planet due to global warming.

Posted on November 5th, 2008 by Thomas
Filed under: News